I cannot stop staring at him; this man in front of me was perfect. His neatly twisted dreadlocks, rough scruffy beard, dark brown complexion, everything about him was perfect. His muscular arms, 6-pack, and cuts! Even his little tight ass was perfect. The way he walked, talked, ate, drank, slept, any and everything he do makes my heart melt. I get a warm tingling sensation throughout my body at the slightest thought of him. I just love me some him.  We’ve been together for five years and I love him more now, than when I first met him. I was 21 years old and he was 26. I just got out of a relationship, not really looking for another one but, it was something about Ray that I couldn’t turn him down. I’m glad I didn’t. Every since then we’ve been inseparable. It has not been an easy journey. Shit, one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to deal with but, he makes it worthwhile.

         “Baby, I gotta make a run right quick,” Ray stated breaking me out of our first encounter daydream.

          “Okay, Ray.” I said nonchalantly. It was a routine thing so, I knew not to trip.

          “Tee, don’t start that shit. Not today.” Ray said adamantly, rushing to put his boots on.

          “I ain’t said shit…yet.” Now, I had an attitude. He know I don’t like these “runs” he makes. I hate them. I wish he’d just get out the game already.

          “Yo, Tee this shit getting real old.”

          “Ray just leave, I don’t feel like arguing with you about this shit, again. Just hurry back.”

          He leaned in to kiss my lips but, I turned my head, forcing him to peck my cheek. He paused for a minute to take a look at me. He shook his head and headed downstairs. His phone started ringing as he went out the door. “I’m on my way.” He said before hanging up. As the tears fell down my face.

          It’s been three years since Ray said he was going to stop hustling. But, soon never came, its only getting longer. Everything was cool when I was 21. He showered me with gifts, treating me like royalty and I loved it. He still does those things, but I wish it came at a different cost. The streets of Rochester, NY were real and I just want to make sure my baby makes it out alive and not in jail. He has a nice stash put away. He could invest in a business. Shit, I make decent money working as a Registered Nurse. We could survive off that alone but, he has to be the “man”. He says it’s his job to provide and protect me, but little does he know, he’s hurting me. I stay up waiting for him whenever he goes out on his late night runs.  I can’t sleep. Why would I sleep when my man isn’t next to me? I check my phone even when it doesn’t ring, to make sure I didn’t miss a text or call. Every car I hear, every door slam, I jump up to look out the window waiting for my King but, he usually take hours. I call his phone, he doesn’t answer. I text him, no response. I keep calling until he finally turns his phone off. I know the game. I know he’s busy but, I can’t help but call.

         I eventually fell asleep tonight, just like any other night, waking up to his warm lips on my neck. I immediately sat up to speak but, he smothers my words with kisses. I wanted to nag him, like any other day but,  I can’t resist his soft lips pressed against mine. He is definitely my kryptonite. The way he ran his fingers down my body, automatically made me shiver. Goosebumps grew all over my body at the touch of this man. My man. He’s so gentle with me, taking his time to kiss every inch of my body, down to my pedicured toes and back up to my thighs. He runs the tip of his tongue in circles on my inner thighs as I let out a gasp. He made me forget I was even mad at him as his mouth reaches my clitoris. As i become his feast, my body shakes letting out cries of passion. Ray made sure he licked every inch, tasting every drip of my juices, leaving me yearning for more.

          As I climax, he takes his last sip inviting me to his lips, as I taste my sweetness of them. We share my sweetness as all my worries goes out the window. He thrushes his rod inside of me, stroking slowly, causing me to arch my back and moan as I gyrate my hips. As I tighten up my walls he goes faster and deeper. We’re both dripping sweat, mouths wide open, on our way to ecstasy. He slows down, trying to catch his breath and I flip him over to ride him. I start off slow, growing faster with each bounce. The look on his face is priceless as he grabs my hips, pounding me harder on his rod. Clapping sounds from our skin echoes off the walls. We make music as my groans get louder and his get deeper. I ride harder as he grabs my ass tighter until we both climax. I crash into his chest, both of us breathing hard. I can feel his heartbeat pound through his chest, interlocking with the rhythm of mine.

        I woke up to the aroma of bacon and maple syrup. I could hear Ray downstairs fumbling around the kitchen. A smiled sprawled across my face as I thought of how lucky I was to have a man like him. Although I don’t agree with everything he do, I respect it. He always made sure I was straight. His main priority was to get money, to protect, to provide and he was doing one hell of a job.

          Now, I mentioned I was 21 when we met. I was just a month away from graduating with my Bachelor’s in Nursing. My stress level was at an all-time high. I was recovering from a miscarriage and a break up with my high school sweetheart. My mother was also battling breast cancer. One of the most glorious times in my life were turning out to be the most horrid. It was hard enough trying to stay on top of my studies with all these emotions going through me daily. I was starting to feel hopeless.

          I remember sitting at my favorite coffee spot with my nose buried into my books when Ray approached me, “Excuse me, Miss?” A deep raspy voice startled me.

          I jumped, damn near out my skin, as I looked up at the 6’4, dark chocolate piece of man in front of me.

          “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” He continued.

          “No…no…you’re fine! I mean…you’re okay.” I babbled, sounding a complete utter mess.

          He laughed so smoothly causing me to smirk, “May I?” He asked pointing to the stool in front of me.

          “Sure, have a seat.” I invited him, trying to rearrange all of my books and papers around, “Excuse the mess. I…” He stopped me.

          “…no problems, beautiful. I see you were focused. I’m sorry to bother you but, I couldn’t leave without getting your name.”

          “Tee. Well my birth name is Tanya but, you can all me Tee.”

          “Okay, Tee. So wassup? Can I hit you up sometime?”

          I wanted to scream hell yeah but, I turned him down, “Um, I don’t think so. I’m very busy, with my studies, my family…” There I was babbling again.

          “How about this, here’s my number,” He scribbled it down on one of my note pages, “hit me when you’re not so busy.” He didn’t even give me a chance to respond. He excused himself from the table leaving me sitting there in awe. My pussy was throbbing, I was trying to do kegels to stop the juice from dripping but, damn he… He? I didn’t even get his name. I thought to myself shaking my head.

          A couple days went by and I still failed to reach out to Him. I was focused on bussing down these exams but, his perfect silhouette was always on my mind. Every time I picked up my note page I was encouraged to call, but I still didn’t. I just reminisced on that day. After all, I was still furious at my ex Kalvin.

          Kalvin and I have were together since our sophmore year in high school. The entire school knew what was up when it came to us. Yes, there was a few bitches who tried it, but they got shut down real quick. Even a couple fellas who were bold enough to step to me, got what was coming to them. After we graduated, I went to college in town but, Kal went to a school about an hour away. He came home every weekend, called every night but, sometimes shit didn’t add up. He was always at a party, our phone calls got shorter, he even started skipping a couple weekend visits back home. All the sweet, ‘I love you’ and ‘I miss you’ turned into ‘Fuck you” and ‘I hate you’, mainly from me. I knew shit just wasn’t right but, Kal being the no confrontational guy he was, would never entertain my suspicions. He’d just started paying me more attention, bringing me gifts home on the weekends, and even popping up for surprise visits. I figure I was being a little too hard on him so, I eased up a bit.

          One day I was pulling up to my parent’s house and as I got out the car, I saw some light skin chick sitting out front. I didn’t pay her to much mind, figuring she was here to visit one of the neighbors, but when she got out and waddled over to me, I stopped in my tracks.

          “Hi, I’m looking for Tanya.” She said with the squeakiest voice I ever heard.

          “And you are?” I was immediately in defense mode. I didn’t care if she looked like she was due to have the baby she was carrying any second now.

          “I’m Dianna. I’m Kalvin’s girlfri…” Before she could even get ‘-end’ off her tongue I lounged at her. So many emotions came over me all I saw was red. I was gonna kill this bitch. Kal was a dead man too. She had the nerve to bring her fat pregnant ass to my parent’s house. How did she even know where I lived? How the hell did she know my name? I heard tires screech before us and Kalvin screaming my name.

          “Tee, yo, Tee. Chill out ma.”

          “Fuck you Kalvin and fuck that bitch too. This is what the fuck you been up to?” I charged at him with all my might; hitting, scratching and kicking him with everything I had in me. I heard that bitch Diana crying.

          “Stop, stop hitting him. Kal, baby, stop her.” I cut my rage off with Kal and headed in the direction of the squeaking mouse. Next thing you know my legs were dangling in the air.

          “Get off me. Get the fuck off me.” I yelled kicking back at whoever was trying to restrain me.

          “Tanya Janae Michaels.” Oh shit, it was Pops. Although I was furious I stopped wiggling and squirming. My heart beating out my chest but, I couldn’t disrespect Pops. I was crying uncontrollably as Pops through me in the house. I saw Mama’s weak body attemping to comfort me.

          “Relax, Margaret.” Pops told my mom. She had recently found out she had breast cancer and was going through her first round of chemotherapy. Mama followed Pops orders, relaxing herself back to a lying position as she stared at me with eyes of despair. She watched my heartbreak into a million pieces and as a mother, she sat there helpless and I could see her heartbreak as well.

          “Tee!” I heard a voice yell. It was Kal. Then I heard a gun cock.

          “Young man, get the fuck of my property before I blow your fucking brains out.” It was Pops, fully loaded, protecting his Princess like a King should.

          Kal didn’t say a word. He just walked away. I could hear that light skin bitch screaming until I heard both their car doors slam and rubber rolling against the pavement.

          Pops returned into the living room. “Tanya, what the fuck…”

          “John.” Mama spoke rather softly but, loud enough for pops to pause and start again.

          “Tanya, what is wrong with you? Out there flipping out like a wild child, hitting a pregnant woman, making a damn fool of yourself.” His voice was calm but, his words were stern, I just sat on the couch trembling.

          “Tanya!” He yelled.

          Mama stood up and Pops forgot he was scolding me as he ran to her aide as she slowly made her way over to me. She sat down and sighed. When she touched my knees the trembling stopped.

          “John, why don’t you just let the child be?” She asked Pops.

          Pops was pacing the living room table. “Let her be? Let her be, Margaret? We did not raise her to…” Mama put her hand up stopping his rant. He stared at her and his eyes softened. He looked at me with disgraced or even pity. He swiped his gun off the coffee table and went out the door.

          “Mama, I’m so…” I started to plead as she weakly raised her finger to my lips.

          “Shhhh, baby.” She said and that was all I needed. I just cried and cried until I could no longer. Mama just held me. Although her hold was weak, her touch alone let me know everything was going to be alright.

          It took me a while to get over Kal’s infidelity. But, I eventually let it go. Yes, it still hurt but, I had shit to do. Dwelling over a man was not on my list. Meeting Ray sent that remainder, but I wasn’t about to trip off him either. As I started to get rid of my notes after my exams, I spotted Ray’s number. I punched into my phone and pressed call.

          “Yo,” he answered.

          “Hi, uh this is…” I started.

          “Tanya.” I could sense him smiling through the phone.

          “Yes, how’d you know?”          

         “I could never forget your voice” It was my turn to blush. “My name is Ray by the way.

          “Ray? Well that’s good to know.”

          His laugh was so glorified, “You didn’t ask.”

          “You didn’t give me a chance to.” I snapped.          

          “Sassy,” he laughed again, “I like that.

          Another smile filled my face, “I didn’t realize I was being sassy. Sorry!”  I apologized.

          “It’s cool ma, no worries. So what you doing tonight?”

          “Uh…nothing really.” I planned to start studying for my NCLEX exam but, he didn’t need to know that.

          “Okay, cool. I’ll pick you up at eight. Text me your address, shorty. I gotta make a run.” Then he hung up. I sat there looking at the phone. He got some nerve, I thought to myself. II was still curious to get to know him, though. I locked his number in and sent him my address.

          Unbeknownst to me I would fall in love with Ray and learn what, “I gotta make a run” really meant.


Be sure to tune in next Sunday to find out what happens next!

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